Dreams (not ss4)

18 Jan

Dreams

Dreams are existence of living

Prehistorically expressions of my subconsouseness

Dwelled in my sleeping two lives will be living

Reality in my awaking and subconscious as I’m sleeping

Who said life doesn’t live on

when we are long gone

Creator of the equator

through violence of the silence

Hence the blinding light

of the sun and the heavy

Thick blanket of dark.

Dreams of the future haunted by the passed

Shone upon by thoughts

Wished upon a star by

Soul catching those memories that were not

Lived to the fullest

Squeeze tightly on those warm memories open your eyes

And they all disappear

That memory felt so real

by Raisa m.f

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4 Responses to “Dreams (not ss4)”

  1. mouthypoets January 24, 2013 at 7:10 pm #

    Hey

    It would be great to know what you think the story behind this poem is; what is happening in it? What do you want your audience/reader to feel and think whilst experiencing this piece?

    If you answer these questions for me, it will help me give you the feedback needed to make this piece achieve what you want it to!

    Debris.

    • chihirotoinspire January 24, 2013 at 7:39 pm #

      its about dreams and how the can form in reality but seem some what unreal. It was based on memories I was asked to write a poem on memories but it did not make sence hence my writing abilities. I came out with a poem of dreams . It is not based on anything but its sureal. hope that helps.

  2. mouthypoets January 27, 2013 at 10:31 am #

    I think this is an interesting topic, but it needs to be more specific. Dreams can be so many different things literally and metaphorically. What do you want your reader to get from this poem? What do you think they are getting from it now?

    Debris x

  3. mouthypoets January 28, 2013 at 11:32 pm #

    I will be researching and redrafting this you are so right I had done this at the start of my mouthy journey thought id share it, I feel i have come far since this xx

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