KPM – Introducing myself :)

9 Jan

Hi, my name is Kai, the German intern who’ll be here in Nottingham until the end of April. I’ll see you all or at least most tomorrow in the session, but before, Deborah asked me to introduce myself on the blog. So I thought: Why not free-write a poem in 5 minutes (excluding research). This is the second poem I have ever written in my life (I wrote one Wednesday, thanks to Jim and Hayley). So this is what came out:


Kai. I love this three lettered name because when I was 12 I could write down my full name in high score lists of computer games. Kai as KAI: 80320 on Earthworm Jim – still on number 1 – I believe. And when you make karate moves you can enhance your power by shouting my name. KAI! Peter is the name which defines my gender. I’m a man when I say “Kai Peter”. But I don’t. I don’t say “I’m Kai Peter”, my true name is Kai because Kai could be any gender, I can be anything anytime I want. Müller. You pronounce the ü like this: Say e and shape your mouth as an o. The tongue, teeth and voice must remain the same. Et voila: ü. As in Müller. I’m one out of 98, born in 87 which is 10 years after Elvis Presley celebrated his birthday for the last time – but I have nothing to do with him except that I dance like him. But a bit more queerly. I’ll show you and you’ll see my abrupt stops, changing the direction of my movements. To be honest, I look sexy and ridiculous with a mustache, so I stick to my beard. And I like my brown curly hair since I was 18. And I bite my finger nails and the skin around it. My oversized head is put on Darth Vader’s black and white body in front of an Imperial Star Destroyer, because I love these high pitched engine sounds of Star Wars you hear when space ships are shooting into space.

I left Braunschweig. I can still feel the coffee warming my cold hands and sitting quietly next to my girlfriend, both of us acting like she and I will sleep separately in oversized beds for the next four months. I can still see the silver ring my friend shows me for his soon-to-be-fiancé. I can still taste the bread we eat every morning in Germany. I can still hear the sound of my yellow robot who eats all my money when I lay a coin on his hand. And I can still smell my girlfriend’s hair while she is leaning on my shoulder in the train to the airport. She smells like a newborn baby.

But I’m in Nottingham now, a resplendent place I’ve never been to before. It’s my first week, and I’m not mouthy – I feel I’m the opposite. So show me what it’s like. Show me what you can achieve with the power of words. Show me how to become (a) mouthy.


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