‘A Self Indulgent Poet’ Final (Adam Broome, SST6 Commission Show, 4 mins)

4 Feb

Stop what you’re doing, and listen to me now

I am a deep, self-indulgent poet, here to talk to you about how hard my life is. Self-indulgent poets are best, ‘cus they’re self-obsessed and stylishly dressed, and always have their hair in a mess. They can always write, upon request, testaments of poetical zest. Tonight I shan’t rest, until you’ve processed, the quality of my deep meaningfulness!


Let’s cover the reasons why war is moronic, and how everything is now electronic.

Be metaphoric in any old topic – even if it isn’t, I will MAKE IT symbolic.

Let’s talk about dreams, and what it all means, and how reality is not what it seems.

Contrast the queen to oppressed teens, and how their ambitions tear at the seams.

Then let’s move on to social norms, and the politics of the tax reforms.

Comment on the everyday swarms of knights and pawns on concrete lawns.

Let’s talk about thongs, and everything wrong with our world, our lives, and unheard tongues.

Let’s talk about change and how things move on, and forget Bob Dylan ever wrote that song.


Please, sir, remove your head from that noose. I know that your soul is in need of a boost, after all that, sit back down. Relax. Talk to me after, we’ll do some smack, and talk about deep, random… ‘middle-class’ things.


If you think this poem is a sign of the times, you should hear the ones where the words don’t rhyme. HAHAHA! Poems aren’t really poems unless you use rhymes. And love – THERE MUST ALWAYS BE LOVE.


Let’s reference light and all things bright, and talk about glittering stars at night. How your soul must fight to stay in flight, and push on each day with all it’s might. I’ll teach you about my poetical plight, setting words alight with no respite, and despite the delight of what I recite, I know deep down… I am the deepest who writes.


Yet people reject me and it often upsets me. But they’re just the ones who don’t get me… you get me?


Lower that gun from your forehead, sir. I know you’re a blur ‘cus I’m so superb, but please allow me to quote this ancient proverb from this Arabic prophet’s final words… …nope, I’ve forgot it. Oh well, it was something to do with ‘enjoying life for what it is’. 


The ones who reject me cannot relate, or associate with the words I vibrate

The truth of it is, basically I’m great, and I just have to accept that haters will hate

Like the judges who rule that I never win – who kick me out before I begin

Who tell me the way I write is a sin; that I must write my poems their way, or akin

Like the workshops that had me denied, access to the advice they supplied

They said the most important thing was that I’d tried, and so I went home with my head held… I cried.


Ha! I didn’t really. Because that was definitely a joke.


Poetry slams have turned me away just because I was too awesome to play, but I told them my integrity makes me this way – I am true to myself, and I’m here to stay. I’ll remain in the fray, and live for today. Keep bad stuff at bay and spray written arrays; essays abound in messy displays, like when I tried cooking my first souffle. 


After all…


There is no valet to Heaven’s chalet. No happy croquet or flowery bouquet. There’s not even soda in this life.


There’s just lemons… and then death.




Please, madam, you don’t need to weep. My words that I’ve spoken are now yours to keep. Though some at the back I see are now asleep, and to that, I shall bow gracefully and say:


I told you I was deep!

Feedback always welcome. Hard to pinpoint exactly what to suggest at this stage though – the version performed on the night will likely be similar to this, but I do plan to adapt the performance in tune with what the audience are responding to. My aim of SST6 is to develop myself as a performer foremost, and the mission here is to make myself into a character thoroughly dislikable, yet win the audience over the nonetheless (so wish me luck haha!)
I don’t need any special stage requirements, but I’ll be around to finalise everything during the tech runs. Stay mouthy, mouthies! 🙂

One Response to “‘A Self Indulgent Poet’ Final (Adam Broome, SST6 Commission Show, 4 mins)”

  1. mouthypoets February 6, 2014 at 10:53 pm #

    Hey Adam,

    Debris here!

    -the whole concept, would be really interested to know what your overarching goal with this is in terms of what you want the audience to leave with other than laughter? Really looking forward to seeing you perform it, have you thought about how you are going to challenge yourself, I really want to see you challenge yourself in performance the way it feels like you have done in this text!

    -the prose poem style really works for the content, and a drastically new form in comparison to previous shows.

    -some amusing uses of easy rhymes, I think you could push that further to a more sophisticated level which I have elaborated on below.
    -the strongest parts of this poem for me is when you use really interesting but still accessible and specific word choices, e.g. Let’s cover the reasons why war is moronic, and how everything now is electronic // metaphoric / symbolic line // queen / teens line // social norms / tax reforms // bob Dylan line 🙂 // associate with the dowries I vibrate //

    -nice ending, again really interested to see how you bring the overall dynamic of uh is to performance!

    Word choices:
    I get that it’s a parody, but I think in the case of comedy being accurate and specific becomes even more vital, I think you could put the following words in a thesaurus and really emphasise the exaggeration of the character as a result; hard, best, rest, process, meaningfulness, remove, relax, random, bright. (notice a lot of these words are there for the purpose of rhyme, I am pulling you up on this because it’s something I am constantly picking up I your work and I want you to challenge yourself on this one, though I know it’s part of the character I think there is for pushing some of these word choices!) This also gives you. The opportunity to play around with the poets rhythm of the words and sentences – this is something particularly important to consider when working with the prose poem form.

    I am a immersive, self-indulgent poet, here to talk to you about how tempestuous my life is. Self-indulgent poets are superior.

    2. Specificity;
    -“Stop what you’re doing” – what are they doing? The washing up scratching their arse, drinking their macchiato… This is your opportunity to tell the audience who they are and give them a context for the poem which is particularly important because some people may have never seen poetry before and not get the parody otherwise!
    -what “dreams”? What might they mean? – That we all fancy our mothers? That we live in a matrix, again a specific reference can tell us more about what kind of poem you are; ridiculous, spiritual, religious etc.
    -poetry slams – maybe think of a way for explaining this for those who won’t know who they are.

    3. I am not sure about the Arabic stanza… It makes the protagonist a bit too unlikeable. I would cut it as I feel the rest of the poet has a much stronger sense of identity and this contrasts it too heavily.

    I hope this has been helpful!

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