my poem for sst8- liaurie ramsey

25 Jan

I can’t say how it all began

It was slow, unnoticeable

Eat a little less, skip a meal, hide it

I don’t know how I came to this place

Once a lover of food, now it fills me with dread

Then the guilt

Always the guilt

I can see you not understanding

It should be simple

Natural

So you tell me to eat a little more

I know you mean well

But you don’t understand what I’m going through

 

The ever raging battle in my mind

Each bite feeling like a betrayal

A diagnosis at 12

A catalyst for this journey I tread

I try to break the cycle

I want to disembark this lonely trail

 

Just a little more

One more bite

I know you mean well

But you don’t understand what I’m going through

 

I suppose it’s hard to comprehend

For you cannot see

the invisible wall that prevents me

with every bite

illogical voices taunt me

weak weak

you don’t see how my perception got distorted

how this all started

my pain at first disregarded

 

Just a little more

One more bite

I know you mean well

But you don’t understand what I’m going through

 

I am becoming stronger

Though some day’s logic is hard to decipher

You may not understand my story

But please listen without judgement

It’s not just about weight

It’s never that simple

Please try to hear

The reason for my fear

 

Just a little more

One more bite

I know you mean well

But you don’t understand what I’m going through

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