SST9 3rd Draft Joshua Jones

28 Jun

Welcome to the Carnival! I will be your guide

Don’t misunderstand me, you haven’t just arrived

You’ve always been here. My name? Dionysus.

Bacchus to the Romans. I’ll show you around

But I must warn you, you won’t believe half of what I tell you

First, the roller coaster. You’re on it now!

An enormous, spherical ride flying around a giant fire ball

Crowd One: How fast?

18.5 miles per second. See, you don’t believe.

It spins at faster than Mach speed.

Crowd Two: That’s impossible!

Ah, you educated ones are slow to believe

Crowd One: But we’d fly off!

There’s magic at work. We can hold on

with nothing more than our toes

Here is our night light. It circles us

and when it passes in front of the sun

it’s perfectly sized to bloc out its light

and when the Earth’s shadow, which

it gets from the fire ball, falls on the moon

it also is perfectly sized to darken its face

Crowd Two: Not possible!

I know… You’re too educated.

Just wait and see…

This is a Carnival drunken with spells

overlaid with an enchantment called “colour.”

No, it’s not photoshopped, those bushes

really are green that sky really is blue

All thanks to what the master of the carnival

calls “light”, some speculate it’s made

of particles- others of waves. The truth?

It’s made of words. Magic words.

Dryad one: Tell them about the bugs

Want to hear something creepy?

Most of those here at the carnival

Have their skeletons on the outside

And they bite us more than we bite them

We have things called giraffes

You’d have to see them to believe

Here we have the magic gardens

Where enchanted trees turn flowers into apples

The dryads and I never tire of that trick

Too far fetched for you university types?

The good boss said you’d be slow to believe.

Crowd One:What are the strangest things here?

The strangest? Easy – the humans.

See what the master designed for them

Here’s the canteen :how humans get nutrients

they serve a thing called food

which has a spell called “taste”

invisible buds make their mouths dance

To the tune of vanilla, fruit, whiskey and steaks

It’s a party that the master invites them all to.

Three times a day.(More if they can get it)

Dryad Two: Tell them about the kissing

Here is the kissing booth: very specific to humans

they have a peculiar division: male and female.

From this comes dancing, letters, broken hearts,

romance and tears and even boxes of chocolates.

The other creatures here know nothing of this.

The over-serious accuse humans of frivolity

but this is how the species reproduces

yes, I have seen a baby human being born

I’m not going to tell you how that happens

You’d never believe me!

Some carnivals boast a bearded woman.

that’s dull compared to the sheer existence of woman.

the strong man with the weights is not as freakish

as the inexplicable existence of man.

unlike the other creatures, humans wear clothes;

even when the climate doesn’t demand it.

they create music, poetry, paintings, and juggle apples.

They make philosophy and speculate why

the carnival is here in the first place

with answers as fantastic as the carnival itself.

There is one price which we must pay

to continue enjoying the carnival.

No money. The Master has made it all Free.

We must lay down poisonous pride.

You make yourself big, and your carnival gets small.

If Alice taught us anything

it was that we first must shrink

to enter Wonderland.

2 Responses to “SST9 3rd Draft Joshua Jones”

  1. secondanne June 29, 2015 at 9:19 am #

    Hi Joshua – this edited version is much tighter – I think having other voices in there really works well – a couple of questions though – if you are Bacchus or Dionysis – who is ‘the master’? I’m guessing ‘God’ – but B and D are gods in their own right and even though Zeus/Jupiter is the main man I don’t reckon B & D would refer to him as the master – so I wonder if you’d be better to drop the name itself. Also the rhetorical question isn’t a very sophisticated tool when the rest of the language is quite sophisticated.

  2. secondanne June 29, 2015 at 9:39 am #

    oh also – the peculiar division male and female? How peculiar? Animals have that and the gods? So how about cutting that too? It would flow straight from the kissing into the boxes of chocolates etc as that is peculiar to humans after all.

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