Nadia Scola -SST10

14 Dec

Light ?

So the theme is light

Light
What do I have to write about concerning light
I have gone onto Google
Looked into past conversations
Spoken to fellow Mouthys

LIGHT for fuck sake .
What do I have I have to say about light
I have a job that is hideous
Which I can offer any one 50% discount on floral shit if they like.
Get yourselves on Bridlesmith Gate.

I have a degree that is useless .
Studied with some right idiots
Live at home with parents who keep hinting for me to move out.
With my income is not humanly possible
Can u please tell me how light is a theme right now

I volunteer here and there and everywhere
People say to me stop volunteering
Keep trying find yourself a better job.
Do u want to hire me?
Do u want to sit on my only day off in 10 days and sit on a laptop filling out an application form that takes you all day that you wont even get a interview for.
Can you see the light at the end of the tunnel yet?

So 4 years of uni debt
False Hope
and
Getting told off for not smiling at the 100th customer who came through the door
This is my new found reason in life
Light
What light

Watching fellow friends succeed in jobs
Getting married
Meeting potential partners
Travelling the world
And here I am on stage moaning about life.
Friends reassurance of why do u work there you are worthy of more babe.
Bullshit no I aint
No one wants to hire me .

I am good at smiling and putting some tulips in my hair and pretending everything is okay
I am really good at pretending that paradise flower is my favourite print and I wear it all the time.
Light
Light

I went to uni to make a point
That I could succeed
So Far
they are eating my words
I have failed.
Light
Yeh there is no fucking light.

 

 

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2 Responses to “Nadia Scola -SST10”

  1. MouthyPoets December 21, 2015 at 1:43 pm #

    Hi Nadia,
    I worked in a call centre in Amsterdam for two years. Every night the stuff I had to say on the phone would replay in my head all night. I had no space in my head for writing or imagination or anything. Sometimes I’d take a pen and think maybe I could write something at the same time as making the calls, but the job wasn’t brain numbing in the sense that I could do something else at the same time, it totally shut down my creativity. Actually then I had no degree – not even a useless one!

    When you’re stuck like that it’s really hard to write, so I sympathise with the struggle that is on the surface of this piece.

    ‘Light’ can be a challenging topic if we associate it with positivity, and if you’re not feeling positive….. but I guess we ‘light’ doesn’t have to be about that. There’s lights everywhere. Artificial lights. Energy saver lightbulbs with pathetic amounts of light. Lampshades from Ikea that the cat scratched. Gloomy daylight.

    And ‘light’ could be how much something weighs too. A light Xmas card that I could blow over, but it’s holding a family history that’s heavy… etc.

    I know I’m writing off the topic a bit here…. my suggestion is you keep writing and keep writing until you get through your immediate feelings/block and surroundings, – there’s parts of your piece that I truly love, e.g:

    I am good at smiling and putting some tulips in my hair and pretending
    everything is okay

    I am really good at pretending that paradise flower is my favourite print and I
    wear it all the time.

    You could keep going with this, use ‘I am good at’ ‘I am really good at’ ‘I am very good at’ I am supremely good at’ as the refrain for a list poem….maybe you need to write through a whole load of darkness to get to a bit of a glimmer. Maybe light is overrated. Maybe you need to go dark! You’d be in excellent company:

    http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/poem/31132
    http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/poem/247344

    Hannah

  2. MouthyPoets January 7, 2016 at 2:14 pm #

    Hi Nadia,

    I really appreciate this poem for so many reasons…

    LOVE
    -It feels honest, yet not scared to make fun of itself, the world and a difficult situation.
    -It is accessible and relatable (unfortunately for so many people)
    -It gives me so many details to see and connect with and as a result I really feel for and feel connected with the narrator.
    -So happy to finally see a funny poem (though it isn’t a funny situation), the candour with which you writing I can really hear in your natural voice and I know I would be cracking up whilst listening but at the same time reflecting on my life which is amazing!
    -‘Can u please tell me how light is a theme right now’, made me laugh out loud and love how you are breaking down the forth wall with this piece.
    -‘People say to me stop volunteering’ Really made me laugh and so true!
    -‘I am good at smiling and putting some tulips in my hair and pretending everything is okay’, wow this line really hit me, I really saw this person at a counter in front of me and I wanted to reach out to them.

    SUGGESTIONS/ CHALLENGES

    1. CLICHES
    I want to challenge you to come up with some more original phrases for the following…
    -‘Can you see the light at the end of the tunnel yet?’
    -‘False Hope’
    -‘they are eating my words’
    -‘I have failed.’
    … There is some guidance on tackling cliches here – https://mouthypoets.wordpress.com/2012/04/28/3-editing-exercises-for-stronger-poetry-2/

    2. SPECIFICITY
    There are few generalisations where I really want to know specific incidences and details e.g.
    ‘Watching fellow friends succeed in jobs’
    …..could be….
    ‘Watching Vanny snort coke off a cereal box in a toilet at JP’
    or ‘Watching Gazza twirl cocktail glasses in St Pauls on Facebook.’
    ….the example you choose will tell me a lot about who you are, what the situation is and probably make me laugh a lot more.

    Some other phrases I want to challenge you to replace with specificity…
    Getting married
    Meeting potential partners
    Travelling the world
    And here I am on stage moaning about life.
    Friends reassurance of why do u work there you are worthy of more babe.
    Bullshit no I aint
    No one wants to hire me .

    3. ENDING
    -Could you end it on the line ‘I am really good at pretending that paradise flower is my favourite print and I wear it all the time.’ and cut everything that comes after it? I just think this image demonstrates what the lines after reiterate and just saying it the once like BAM and hitting me with that image is enough.

    I hope this is some kind of helpful!
    See you soon
    Debris

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