Bridie 2nd Draft

8 Jan

We sat smoking fags
on the kitchen floor
and you said you wished for
the whole country
to go up in flames.

I shrieked drunken
righteousness, “Think
of the women and children.
You have been left
with his babies, think.”

I don’t know what I was thinking.

I sat and watched
your face swallow
a foreign bullet,
sink into the flesh
of I told you so.

I told you so
like I never invaded
personal space, scratched
faces until they bled.
I told you so

like I never grinded
the tectonic plates
of my teeth, sending
vibrations of deathwish
on human enemies.

And you…

You sat and quaked
lips, thumbing the empty
spaces in your skin
that the thick in his voice
once filled, over and over.

I smelt the burning
plastic in the wounds
of every toy civilian
but didn’t see you drowning,
searching for a lighthouse.

Really basic tech setup please. Just a spot.
Looking at 1.30 minutes I reckon, although I still feel like this poem will change a lot by the third draft.


One Response to “Bridie 2nd Draft”

  1. MouthyPoets January 10, 2016 at 1:54 pm #

    I like the contrast in those lines ‘…you have been left with his babies, think.’// I don’t know what I was thinking…’ I feel like a lot of people can relate to wanting to be able to unsay things (Sorry if that’s not what this is about, that’s what comes across to me!) and I love how honest this poem is in its depiction of one of these moments.‘thumbing the empty places in your skin/that the thick in his voice/ once filled, over and over.// I smelt the burning/ plastic in the wounds/ of every toy civilian.’ I love both these images & how they’re so close together, seems to tie all the strands of this poem together well.

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